Monthly Archives: December 2012

pregnant again

Mia’s story…

choose to live


On our way to Minnesota I saw this billboard…

“Smile!  Your mother was pro life”

I am thankful that my mother was.  I have letters from my father when my mother was pregnant with me and there were discussions on what they should do.  My fathers words were basically no way would abortion be an option.  Being that it was in 1974 (ok, you can calculate if you want :)) it might have seemed like the easy way out.  But they chose life.

I think about all that have chose life, I dare say none have regretted that choice.  But the simple choice I made leaves unending regret.

But please KNOW that through this regret, I am able to find redemption over and over again.  I feel it when I talk with other women in my shoes.  I see it when I can help someone else make an informed decision.

I choose to LIVE each and every day I have left.



This weekend we braved the winter elements and traveled to Minnesota to visit the Mall of America.  We haven’t had a road trip in a while and have always wanted to go…so my husband and I thought, why not!

On our way we went past this city.  Menomonie.  This reminded me of the muppets skit: Mahna – Mahnam.

It’s really only funny if you remember the skit, so I found the youtube video for you below.  🙂 My husband caught on pretty quickly because he wouldn’t answer my questions anymore.

I would ask, “What city is that?”
He said, “Menomonie”
I’d say “do do do do doot…doo doo doo doot.”

Let’s say it was stuck in our heads the whole trip.

how will they know

IMG_1520 - Version 2

How will they know …

If we keep silent, how can we share our secret.

How will they ever know how it hurt.

How the pain and shame filled us up as we walked out the clinic doors.

The self-hatred and anger that poured into our souls.

That it wasn’t the simple decision they told us it was.


That we suffer alone as pieces of us were stolen and rotted away.

Suffering in silence.

How will they know?  We have to tell them.

Speak the truth.  Squash the lies.  Break the silence.

Our stories together will be like a symphony of truth.

a surrendered life


I just started reading a book written by Pat Layton called “A Surrendered Life“.  This is a book about finding healing, freedom and hope from the heartbreak of abortion.  She also wrote the bible study we use in our healing groups called “Surrendering the Secret”.

I have heard her speak.  She has an amazing testimony.  It will make you cry, laugh, and rejoice with her.

In her book she states that every one of us has been affected by abortion.  Because 43% of all women have had at least 1 abortion, that equates to 1 out of 3 women.  If I take just my abortion.  It affects me, my sister, my parents, my grandparents, my aunts, uncles, my nieces, nephew, my friends.  It ripples out from there.  There is no where you can go to escape being affected by abortion.

Her book is another example of the importance of sharing our stories with each other.  I think of all the women that have been helped because Pat Layton was willing to open herself up and many other men and women like her.  It is this courage that urges me on.  When I want to be silent, I think about others who have gone before me and instead of shrinking back into the shadows I stand firm.

Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.  Let all that you do be done in love.  1 Corinthians 16:13-14 (NASB)

less like scars


and more like character…